I've always been the reader and movie-lover in my friend group. The way that stories and characters inspire me to be the best version of myself touches my soul in a way that nothing else does. I was already an imaginative child, but after my family moved across our state, I spent all of middle school connecting with fictional words and characters, so I spoke to relationship expert Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, for a look at why our bonds with fictional characters are so strong.
I've always been the reader and movie-lover in my friend group. The way that stories and characters inspire me to be the best version of myself touches my soul in a way that nothing else does. I was already an imaginative child, but after my family moved across our state, I spent all of middle school connecting with fictional words and characters, so I spoke to relationship expert Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, for a look at why our bonds with fictional characters are so strong.
As I aged, I felt like I was growing up with my favorite characters, from The Chronicles of Narnia's Lucy Pevensie to the various superheroes in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. As someone who's on the quieter side, it's always been inspiring to see characters that are brave under pressure because it makes me feel like I can be brave, too.
"Fictional romances can make us believe that our own romances should look exactly as we see them on the screen," Earnshaw says. "The same with how friendships and family relationships might be represented. But in real life, relationships are more complex and include day-to-day interactions which can't possibly be demonstrated on TV."
With so many shows and movies available, it takes no time at all to fall out of one hyperfixation and into another, but Earnshaw says that's not necessarily a bad thing. "Remind yourself that it's okay to have a fantasy! It is also okay to admire a character. I think it's super important not to have shame around this," she says. "And then, use that admiration and fantasy to consider what it means for your real life — what are you hoping for? What type of connections do you need?"
It can be nerve-racking to be meeting your in-laws for the first time, but it's important to relax and be yourself. This doesn't mean you should act like they're just any other acquaintance, or that you should let your guard down SO much, you end up acting inappropriately (there's no need to do tequila shots and suggest playing Cards Against Humanity, for example).
It can be nerve-racking to be meeting your in-laws for the first time, but it's important to relax and be yourself. This doesn't mean you should act like they're just any other acquaintance, or that you should let your guard down SO much, you end up acting inappropriately (there's no need to do tequila shots and suggest playing Cards Against Humanity, for example).
selective focus photography of plant
Photo by Rather, show genuine interest in what they're saying, answer their questions honestly and pleasantly, and don't be afraid to politely disagree on low-stakes topics like your favorite travel destination, musician, or after-work activity. If you disagree on anything more high-stakes (i.e. politics), it's best to save those conversations for sometime down the line when you know each other better and have already established a relationship.
2 girls sitting on floor
Photo by Rather, show genuine interest in what they're saying, answer their questions honestly and pleasantly, and don't be afraid to politely disagree on low-stakes topics like your favorite travel destination, musician, or after-work activity. If you disagree on anything more high-stakes (i.e. politics), it's best to save those conversations for sometime down the line when you know each other better and have already established a relationship.
The Great Report
2020 Global Report Sheet
