I've always been the reader and movie-lover in my friend group. The way that stories and characters inspire me to be the best version of myself touches my soul in a way that nothing else does. I was already an imaginative child, but after my family moved across our state, I spent all of middle school connecting with fictional words and characters, so I spoke to relationship expert Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, for a look at why our bonds with fictional characters are so strong.
I've always been the reader and movie-lover in my friend group. The way that stories and characters inspire me to be the best version of myself touches my soul in a way that nothing else does. I was already an imaginative child, but after my family moved across our state, I spent all of middle school connecting with fictional words and characters, so I spoke to relationship expert Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, for a look at why our bonds with fictional characters are so strong.
As I aged, I felt like I was growing up with my favorite characters, from The Chronicles of Narnia's Lucy Pevensie to the various superheroes in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. As someone who's on the quieter side, it's always been inspiring to see characters that are brave under pressure because it makes me feel like I can be brave, too.
"Fictional romances can make us believe that our own romances should look exactly as we see them on the screen," Earnshaw says. "The same with how friendships and family relationships might be represented. But in real life, relationships are more complex and include day-to-day interactions which can't possibly be demonstrated on TV."
With so many shows and movies available, it takes no time at all to fall out of one hyperfixation and into another, but Earnshaw says that's not necessarily a bad thing. "Remind yourself that it's okay to have a fantasy! It is also okay to admire a character. I think it's super important not to have shame around this," she says. "And then, use that admiration and fantasy to consider what it means for your real life — what are you hoping for? What type of connections do you need?"
When we reflect on our own path as women in light of the women who came before us, it’s easy to see that the loads we’ve carried haven’t always been the lightest. From everyday stresses to generational trauma with roots that are difficult to trace, one must ask where all that weight goes if we never release it.
The body holds the score for all the anxieties, worries, and unease that we’ve endured over time. Family and society often tell us to quiet our emotions, maintain a brave face, and keep our emotions bottled up within. But as we know, anything with too much pressure will eventually burst.
The Great Report
2020 Global Report Sheet
